Parody: Porn (to the tune of “Vogue” by Madonna)

What are you looking at?

Pop the tape
Pop the tape
porn, PORN, porn
porn, PORN, porn

Home alone, every night it’s all the same thing
There’s no one out there for you (you’re home alone)
You try everything you can to pretend
That you’ve got someone to screw (someone to screw)

When it gets too much and you have to see
Naked people getting it on
I know a way where you can get it all
It’s called a porno, and it’s a lot of fun, so

Rent some, porn
Just pretend that you’re inside there (you’re inside there)
Unh, unh, unh
Rent some, porn
Let your hands just go where they want to (where they want to)
No one knows you do it

All you need is a good remote control,
Some lube so you don’t get sore (you don’t get sore)
Soft towels, maybe a whole box of Kleenex
And be sure to lock all your doors! (lock all your doors!)

It makes no difference if you’re dull or gross
It you’re a dweeb or a nerd
When your hand is pumping you can be who you like
You’re a cheerleader, or, maybe a whore, you know it

Rent some, porn
Just pretend that she really wants you (she really wants you)
Unh, unh, yeah
Rent some, porn
Let your semen go with the flow (go with the flow)
No one knows you do it

Sex is in your tv screen
No one there is cruel or mean
When the lights are turned down low
That’s when you pretend that you’re Rob Lowe
There you go, tally-ho
So get up off your knees and

Rent some, porn
Just pretend that that’s your dick there (that’s your dick there)
Unh, unh, damn
Rent some, porn
Don’t forget to stroke with the grain (stroke with the grain)
No one knows you do it

Porn, (porn)
Just do what you have to (she really wants you)
Porn, (porn)
Just do what you have to (stroke with the grain)
Vogue, (Vogue)

Jenna Jameson, and Mai Lin
Seka, Amber, Ginger Lynn
Keischa, Janet Littledove
they’re the ones we love to love

Nina Hartley, Rhonda Jo
I know where I want to go
Peter North and Thomas, Paul
Asia Carrera did ‘em all

They had tits, they had tongue
Traci Lords was just too young
Houston, Madison, Tara too
Hyapatia, we love you

They’re all right there in the nude,
Waiting, hoping to be screwed
Don’t just hold it, get to yanking
Lock your knees and keep on wanking

Porn, porn

Oooh, you’ve got to
Keep rewinding to the good scene
Oooh, you’ve got to just
Make pretend that you are Charlie Sheen
Oooh, you’ve got to get

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